Retail Pack (Target)

Released: 2015
Summary: Sold through Target.com with 20 new cards themed around being in a Retail Store. The pack is silver and comes with an instant $1 rebate, which is a dollar bill inside the pack.

White Cards:

  • The obscene amount of money Cards Against Humanity is making by selling this game at Target.®
  • Confusing possessions with accomplishments.
  • Getting eaten out in the family fitting room.
  • Crunchy snacks for my big flappy mouth.
  • Buying the right toothbrush cup for my lifestyle.Gender-neutral toys that make children feel no emotions whatsoever.
  • A framed photocopy of an oil painting of Paris, France.
  • An exclusive partnership with Taylor Swift.
  • Buying and returning clothes just to have someone to talk to.
  • A Pringle.®
  • How fun it is to eat Pringles.®
  • A Pringles® can full of screams.
  • Blood Pringles.®
  • Shiny gadgets for sadness distraction.
  • Saving 20% or more on khakis.
  • An 800-foot-long pool noodle.
  • Refusing to go up a size.
  • Subsisting on tiny pizzas.
  • Extracting the maximum amount of money from naive consumers.

Black Cards:

  • Wait, I came here to buy socks. How did I wind up with ________?